“And remember, no matter where you go, there you are.”
Confucius, a Chinese Philosopher
The best advice I ever received came from someone close to me during a tough time.
I considered abandoning a significant commitment, and this individual suggested I should not give up. “If you run from this situation, you will run for the rest of your life.” “Honor your pledge and stay until your contract is up.”
I followed this advice, which has led to benefits that I did not even consider possible all those years ago.
It taught me a valuable lesson about facing adversity. The path of least resistance always looks attractive at the moment, but it is due to being unable to grasp the big picture. In most circumstances, the real issue is not external but internal processing.
Dodging uncomfortable situations is a part of the human condition.
However, facing our difficulties becomes what leads to growth. Developing proficiency in areas where we were once a novice creates confidence in our ability to sustain ourselves. We find out we are significantly more capable than our previous notions.
Building upon that reality can lead to an outcome distinct from our starting point.
Running from our problems usually only changes the scenery of our difficulty; our troubles also come along for the ride. Whatever issue we have, the real culprit resides with our processing.
How do we deal with conflict? How do we respond when things do not go according to plan?
Life will always surprise us, and things sometimes do not go as projected. In those moments of despair, our lives face their most salient times. These situations, in many ways, define who we end up becoming.
If we constantly withdraw from every challenging moment, those issues are the ceiling for our existence.
It is also vital to remember that the context of every situation changes the appropriateness of our responses. If an individual works in a toxic environment, sometimes quitting and finding other employment makes the most sense.
Suffering for the sake of ego or pride with destructive people becomes an unnecessary burden.
A sociopath will act that way, whether or not we are there. Certain organizations will allow individuals like that to flourish without removing them from power. To stay and battle with those characters will cause unnecessary stress.
In most circumstances, the actual battle comes from within.
Our resistance to change or pain leads to all kinds of responses. Accepting the reality of the circumstance does not mean agreement. It entails acknowledging that this issue, while rugged now, cannot last forever.
The resolve we cultivate will add critical strength to our character. It is internal fortitude which helps one stay in the moment through the tough days.
All of our lives will include trying occurrences. While fleeing makes sense in some situations, what we usually need to do involves staying and learning from the episode. Spending our whole lives taking off at the first sign of hardship will not help us in the long run.
We will eventually get fatigued from consistently being on the move.
To use football terminology, we need to have the skill to stay in the pocket and make the next play. Things may come at us from many angles, but the ability to hang in there long enough to score a touchdown becomes the wise move.
If we get in the habit of deserting a situation every time it gets troublesome, we will never know the vastness of our capabilities.
In the end, that fact would haunt us as the ultimate tragedy.
Vertis Williams is a Positive Habits Life Coach and a Mindfulness Trainer. He is a regular presenter at employee and team-development events. Contact him to request more info on his Workshops or on his Coaching Services! Click HERE to Request a Complimentary Habit Coaching Session!